Earlier this year I sat on a bench munching away at cherry tomatoes – the only thing that Baby W seemed to allow into my system. I was about 5 months pregnant, and yes, the dreaded nausea just would not leave. I saw a girl staring at me with that, “What the heck is wrong with that girl eating tomatoes first thing in the morning!?” So I hoped she was a mom and while patting my belly, I said, “Gotta eat what the baby lets me eat!” She pulled out a bottle of water and said, “And drink whatever the baby lets me drink!”, as she returned a pat on her own belly. YES! Not only had I found a mom to commiserate with, but I found a PREGNANT mom! Score!
My new friend, OV, turned out to be a really sweet girl from Moldova who was 6 months into her very first pregnancy. She is married and her in-laws live locally, but her family, just like mine, is far, far away (across the big pond, to be exact). So we bonded. We bonded over morning/day/evening/night sickness, we bonded over husbands that just don’t get it, and we bonded over people moving clear out of our way as we waddled down the street. But mostly, we bonded over the fact that our families, particularly our moms, were very far away.
This is my third go around with pregnancies, so I have to admit I have not been very scared (don’t quote me on that when D-Day arrives!), but poor OV: she was nervous. I tried my best over the next few months to help her prepare, both mentally and physically for what was to happen. “It won’t be pretty or clean; it will hurt like hell! BUT, the moment they place that baby on your chest, you won’t even realize the doctor is still down under fishing for more gunk!”
We shared in baby shower laughters and glared down together the cruel, heartless people who made “WOWZA! Looks like you’re about to blow!!” comments. (FYI, NEVER EVER say that, it’s not cool). (Even if it is possibly true).
And finally five days ago I received a text from her: “Girl, I think my waters just broke!” Let me be honest here: I was very happy for her, VERY. But I also wanted to very much punch her. VERY. I mean, how did SHE get to go into labor and NOT ME?! Sure, sure, she was a whole month ahead of me, but the injustice! I wished her well, of course, and asked that she kept me up-to-date.
Baby Mayson was born May 23 at 1.10 pm weighing a whopping 8 pounds 3 ounces and is 21 inches long. He has a beautiful head-full of dark hair and dark dark eyes. Beautiful baby!
When my jealousy subsided, and I knew Mamma OV had finally regained some kind of senses from what turned out in fact to not being “pretty or clean”and did in fact “hurt like hell”, I finally spoke to OV and she gave me a full recount of the whole endeavor (most interesting fact to me was an article she read stating that rolling gently – on your bum – on a yoga/exercise ball will ease and open your cervix – and within hours of rolling, her waters broke!) But when I asked her the most grueling question: How do you feel as a mom? she surprised me: “It feels so weird. 🙂 I still cannot believe he came out of me! 🙂 Every time he cries or burps or farts, I have a small heart attack. I don’t know how you are willing to endure the pain a THIRD time, but I definitely want more babies too!” And there you have it! U, moms, we all cringed and screamed and cursed for hours on end, but then it’s over – you hold that little prize and you realize you would do it all over again and again just to see his face! Mother Nature is cruel and mean and kind of gross, but she is also absolutely beautiful and magical!
Attention all dads: my second question for OV had to do with her husband. Now you see, Baby W will be The Man’s first son, so he is a nervous wreck. I have been searching for ways to ease his nerves, but this is my third go around and only his first. I remember how scared I was, but I surely do not know how it must feel to be the dad. So I asked OV how her husband and first time daddy reacted. She said, “He was so very excited!! I will never forget the look on his face when he first saw the baby!” Moms, do you remember the look she’s talking about? There are only 3 times in your WHOLE life that your man will look that amazing: when he is on his knees proposing, when he’s standing at the altar looking down the aisle at you walking toward him, and lastly, when he sees his first (and yes, second, third, fourth, etc) born. It’s a look of pride, joy, love – it’s, once again, Mother Nature at her best!
I saw OV today, holding Baby Mayson. She was still the girl I met a few months back, who also took on the habit of eating cherry tomatoes like they were candy. But she was also different today. She truly became a woman, a mother. That little baby became the new focus of her life, he has taken center stage and she could not be any happier. And I swear to you, I also could not be any happier for her too! Mostly because I also have a yoga ball that is about to be sat on… cross your fingers and wish me and Baby W godspeed!